SPICE is challenging 5 mindsets !

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  1. As long as I have an excellent heart, I am fine with weak kidneys and a suboptimal liver. This is ridiculous but this is how we normally live our lives. We believe that we can only excel in one dimension, one realm of our lives, not in all or more dimensions. Out of various realms of life – persona, professional, partnerial or parental, it is possible to excel in one of these. SPICE intends to fix our fixation with one-dimensional life.
  2. Boys fix things. Girls need things fixed. This is ridiculous, again, but we normally differentiate between genders like this. Men are physiologically and psychologically better programmed for professional pursuits and women are similarly better suited for partnering, caregiving, parenting, and family building. SPICE wants to break the ‘separate spheres ideology’ that men should excel outside the home and women should excel inside the home.
  3. Is a ‘list of deathbeds regrets of women’ available? Well, no, no one ever thought about it. We only have such lists for men. Ridiculous, but true. The realms in which women are expected to excel are not given the importance that they deserve outside the home. Partnerial and parental skills are ‘lowlights’ and professional skills are ‘highlights’ of life. All the work that goes into raising a family, sustaining a marriage, fostering self-improvement and solving world issues is just a side dish on the plate of life. SPICE strives to bring women perspective in the professional arena with the dignity that it deserves.
  4. If you are a marathon runner and a CEO learning from running can improve your skills as a CEO and vice-a-versa. But people are ‘domain dependent’. They fail to recognize the same idea when it is presented in a different context. They feel that transfer learning happens amidst machines only. SPICE ventures boldly into the importance of transfer learning between various realms of life.
  5. You are 65. Please retire from work and life. Ridiculous once again. But followed by most of us. We retire from living by the time we become platinum and wait gloomily for diseases and death to strike. This is our worst service to ourselves. SPICE embraces life after 50 as the beginning of a robust second-half of career and life after 75 as a dignified dotage plan.

Are you ready to incorporate these changes into your mindset? If yes, excellence is waiting for you. If no, don’t complain about your present.

 

Don’t separate Work and Play.

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I don’t separate work and play – it’s all living, says Richard Branson.

Why don’t most of us understand this fluidity of our lives which gives us fulfillment?Why do we chase professional success and fame leaving behind our partnerial, parental and even personal journeys?

We sprint with a professional cape on, while the other Ps – Partner, Parent, and Person in us wait for tomorrow that never comes.

Wait. Look back. Pick up all the Ps and change your race.

Go into a marathon with all the Ps – Professional, Partner, Parent, and Person within you.

This is a serious advice I am giving myself these days.

Do you agree?

Having ‘skin in the game’ means ‘investing your own money in the company that you are promoting’. In simple words, having ‘skin in the game’ means ‘owning the risk in the game’.

Do not own a part of your life.

Own the whole.

Invest yourself in all the four Ps – Person, Professional, Partner and Parent in you.

Politicians announcing wars have no skin in the game unless their children go to the war while the army men have their skin in the game.

Let all the Ps have skin in the game.

Nassim Nicholas Taleb says that the artisans whose survival depends on their reputation have skin in their game.

If being a responsible partner, parent, & person becomes a sign of good reputation, only then these roles will have ‘skin in the game’.

Own all your realms. Take risks, be volatile and vulnerable but value yourself as a partner and parent, as much as you value yourself as a person and a professional.

Do you agree?

How to be a SPICE Person, Partner & Parent?

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How to be a SPICE Person?

Everything is amazing, but nobody cares.

We are ‘grateful’ for a second and we are ‘resentful’ for the remaining fifty-nine seconds in a minute.

This is so because We “adapt” within a second to whatever we were grateful, a second ago. We start feeling “deserving” within a second for whatever we were grateful, a second ago.

We start “sneaking” into others’ lives after a second and find reasons to be resentful.

Let’s schedule a “Gratitude Reminder” every night on our phones. {Earlier I thought of suggesting a ‘Gratitude Diary’ but then…..:)}

How to be a SPICE Partner?

If you tell a friend how lucky she is to have a comfortable life, she might agree on your face but would think to herself “Live in my shoes & you will know”.

When you ‘tell’ a person something, it is not accepted easily.

When you ask “Do you think you are lucky?”, it is most likely to create a positive response, on the face as well as in the mind.

So “Ask, not tell” is the mantra.

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How to be a SPICE Parent?

Learning doesn’t begin on the first day of school.

Learning begins on the first day of life.

We know it, but do we follow it?

A newborn can develop 80% of his/her brain in the first three years of his/her life.

Guess what? This opportunity is lost after the first three years.

It is not a pre-school that matters.

It is a parent who matters.

It is a grandparent who matters.

Kids who are talked to consistently in first 1000 days know thirty million more words than kids who are merely watched over.

Make your home language rich.

Beware! It is not screen-talk that helps. It is face-to-face responsive talk that works wonders.

Talk to the new-born.

What is your favourite failure?

Find out your favorite failure & discover yourself.

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What is your ‘favorite failure’?

If you start thinking about it, let’s go a little deeper.

  • What is your favorite failure as a spouse?
  • What is your favorite failure as a parent?
  • What is your favorite failure as a professional?

Share your answers and know yourself better.

My answers are

  • I have failed to develop a daily shared routine for my partner and me.
  • I have failed to inspire my daughter to pick a sport.
  • I failed to scale-up my first venture.

What is your Super Weakness?

Find Your “sPice – Sum of Partner, Parent, Professional, and Person In you to Create Excellence”.

1. What is your Super Weakness
Pic Courtesy – Swaraa Lodha

A writer friend told me, “I do not think about my superpowers”. I do not ask myself “What I am excellent at?” I think about my super-pains, my super-weaknesses. I ask myself, “What am I weird or weak about?”

Can we embrace our super-weaknesses – to ourselves? If we can, we can own them.

What we own, we can share.

What we share, others relate to it.

That helps them in asking themselves, “What is my super-weakness?”

#SPICE